Good Grief

It's been awhile since Russ has had to feel the pain of death.  My heart is broken for him.  The kids, especially Aurora picked up on it right away.  She kept asking him why he was crying, even though she knew the answer.  "Boys don't cry."  was her response.  And traditionally boys don't cry, I'm not quite sure why because a good cry always makes you feel better.  But when they do, it is usually a doozy.  I can still see my Dad collapsing and sobbing uncontrollably after he got the call his Mom had passed away.  It wasn't his finest moment, but in that moment I saw a glimpse of his heart.  I was only 9 at the time, but it will probably stick with me forever. 
It doesn't matter how old or how expected someone's death is, it still hurts the same. While there is joy of a reunion in heaven, it doesn't numb the pain felt here on earth.  It does "get better" but it never goes away. 
I felt helpless trying to comfort my husband.  When he said "all my friends are dying," my heart broke clean in two. I suggested that he stay home and process the whole situation, but of course he refused.  His schedule next week is a little messed up because of our upcoming trip to Texas and he only gets 24 hours of paid bereavement time.  He said that we couldn't afford to take unpaid time, but I'm pretty sure we can't afford to have him not grieve properly.  So of course after 2 days of little sleep and a lot of stress, he got up at 4:30 and headed off to work.  I've never had to help my husband through grief in the almost 13 years we have been together.  So this is uncharted territory for me. Prayers are always appreciated.